Living on the surf coast of Victoria with her three children – Frankie (5), Billy (3), and Jordan (1) – Lila’s journey to motherhood began after relocating from Broome, WA. Coming from the UK where home births are more common, she initially hoped for one but opted for shared care through the public system for financial reasons.

Her first birth with Frankie took an unexpected turn when documentation issues arose at the hospital: “I was met with the ultimatum on my due date of either having an induction or a C-section… I just thought, shit, I need to decide on the spot.” Despite the pressure, she chose induction and achieved a vaginal birth with interventions including an episiotomy and vacuum assistance.

For her second birth, Lila approached things differently, arming herself with knowledge: “The main two things that changed my path with my second birth was Rhea Dempsey’s book, Birth with Confidence, and getting a doula.” This preparation led to a dramatic but empowering experience, with active labour starting during a 45-minute drive to the hospital. “I got Cherie on speakerphone, she was convoying behind us in her car and I remember bumping down the gutter out from our driveway onto the road and I just thought this is not going to work.”

They eventually had to pull over at a bus stop, where the birth seemed imminent: “Cherie came around to my side and opened the door and she asked for consent and then just asked to have a check of what was happening… heads on show.” They managed to make it to the hospital where Billy was born in the water birth pool shortly after arrival.

For her third pregnancy, Lila finally achieved her dream of a home birth, though it wasn’t without its challenges: “I had to advocate for myself, even within my own family system and at home with Jared and just say, look, this is really, really what I want.” The birth itself was beautiful and quick, lasting only four hours.

However, at 48 hours postpartum, baby Jordan showed concerning symptoms: “He still hadn’t passed meconium… the vomiting turned more kind of foamy and then it turned to bile… and then he went all floppy.” This led to a 12-day NICU stay where Jordan was diagnosed with Hirschsprung’s disease, a rare condition affecting the colon.

“I am so glad and so grateful that I had the birth experience that I did because that really set me up for being in there and again, trying to be back in a system that I was trying so hard to not be in and be able to navigate that as best I could,” Lila reflects on how her positive birth experience helped her cope with the medical challenges that followed.

The story concludes with Jordan’s ongoing journey through surgery and recovery, demonstrating the delicate balance between natural birth advocacy and necessary medical intervention: “We’re only just kind of out of the thick of it. I feel like it was 12 months of absolute, again, survival mode and just really attuning to him and his needs and the condition and learning as best we could.”

This powerful narrative showcases not only the evolution of one woman’s birth experiences but also the importance of being prepared for unexpected turns while maintaining trust in both our bodies and medical expertise when needed. Lila’s story will continue in a future episode where she’ll discuss attachment parenting and her postpartum journey in more detail.