Sam’s story begins with an unplanned but welcomed pregnancy on their first wedding anniversary, which ended in a devastating loss at 12 weeks. She speaks candidly about the clinical and often insensitive way this news was delivered and the challenging experience of having a D&C at North Shore Public Hospital. Following this loss and subsequent chemical pregnancy, Sam sought support from a perinatal psychiatrist who she found incredibly supportive.

When Sam fell pregnant with Tilly, she connected with the MGP (Midwifery Group Practice) program at Tweed Hospital. Despite the anxiety that accompanied pregnancy after loss, she navigated an induction at 39+5 weeks due to blood pressure concerns and liver function issues. Tilly’s birth, though quick for a first-time mother, introduced Sam to the world of birthing big babies – with Tilly weighing in at 4.21kg and accompanied by a remarkably large placenta weighing over a kilo.

For her second birth, Sam chose to go private at John Flynn Hospital, seeking a different experience from her shared room in the public system. However, Freddie had his own plans, arriving dramatically fast just after midnight on her father’s 60th birthday. The birth was so quick that Scott nearly missed it after leaving to move the car.

Charlie’s pregnancy was an unexpected surprise, discovered while celebrating at her sister-in-law’s hen party in Sydney. Returning to the public system at the new Tweed Valley Hospital, Sam reunited with Jess, her midwife from Tilly’s birth, highlighting the special connection that continuity of care can provide. This birth proved to be the “tricky third” that many speak of, with several days of stop-start labour before Charlie finally arrived in a peaceful water birth, weighing 4.366kg – the biggest of all three of her babies.

Throughout her pregnancies and births, Sam evolves from an uncertain first-time mother to a confident advocate for her birth preferences. By her third pregnancy, she felt empowered to decline some interventions like growth scans and gestational diabetes testing. Her story beautifully demonstrates how each birth experience builds upon the last, providing valuable lessons and increased confidence.

Sam’s story offers hope and wisdom for those navigating pregnancy after loss, while highlighting the importance of finding care providers who align with your preferences. Her journey from not knowing what an episiotomy was during her first birth to confidently advocating for her preferences during her third demonstrates the empowerment that can come through experience and education in childbirth.